Alex Letter 1

(Note: Fiction)

Dear Meredith,

I know that it's bizarre to be opening a letter from me. Don't you start with that dismissive look, the one that you flash over the rims of your trendy glasses. Believe me, it's an even crazier feeling for me to be writing this. I wouldn't be doing it if I weren't completely desperate. But not in the way that you're thinking. I am not that desperate. I have plenty of options as far as that category of life is concerned.

The subject of this note is not myself by my brother, your dear boyfriend, though it disgusts me to apply that appellation to him. Ever since his miraculous recovery from that sickness (I still blame something suspicious in the Latin Club bake sale brownies, but nobody listens to me), something has been wrong with Michael. Creepy things are happening around here. The situation is dire. You have to help me figure this out. We should meet in person to discuss this further. Any time of day that does not conflict with marching band practice should be negotiable.

Thanks,
Alexander


(Note: to be continued)

Those Letters

Well, goodbye March and daily blogging. Looking forward to a more spontaneous April. For my grand letter-themed finale, my intent was to put a whole hoard of letters on here, from some creative writing that I turned into epistles for fun. But blogger is in some sullen mood and is not happy with me copy-and-pasting from Word. So, just one letter at a time, then.....

Getting Close to the End

I'm looking forward to the end of March and all this bloggery. Some days it is a heavy obligation! Gets in the way of more creative writing (fiction, I mean), which I've found that generally I don't like to post on here. I still don't really know in which direction I want to take the blog. But I didn't write about food too much, did I? Feeling self-conscious about that. But I will get to that letters theme. Very soon.

Monday Randoms

• Trixie is finally down to every-other-day eye drop dosing. This is a huge improvement in our relationship. She is currently cuddled up next to my hip, rather than huddled at the opposite corner of the couch.
• I started watching a version of Anna Karenina on Netflix, the one starring Nicola Pagett. I thought it was a three-hour movie. After two hours, I learned that it is a THIRTY-HOUR miniseries. But I love it. It makes me appreciate the book even more.
• The carpet installation is scheduled for mid-April. This means that I may shop for the piano now!
• For April, I am going to challenge myself to see how little I can spend on groceries, then put that saved money into further reduction of the student loan. I don't really want to revolutionize my eating habits--I really like spending a bit more to buy grass-fed antibiotic-free beef, milk from the local creamery where cows are hormone-free and treated with respect, eggs from free-range chickens, organic veggies, fair-trade chocolate and coffee, ten-year aged cheddar, etc. But I don't think that I need to be grocery shopping three times per week. So with this in mind, I've already cheated a bit. I've stocked up on staples (olive oil, almonds, canned tomatoes, jasmine brown rice, steel-cut oats....) this weekend to make the April cost-savings challenge a bit easier.
  

Stale Bread

Nearly all of my most treasured childhood books featured food scarcity. And usually, brutal winters. I think of one of my favorites, A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, every time that I consider throwing out a heel of stale bread. Mostly I just dip it in soups or make croutons, but I had to look up this excerpt that has been haunting me:

"The Nolans practically lived on that stale bread and what amazing things Katie could make from it! She'd take a loaf of stale bread, pour boiling water over it, work it up into a paste, flavor it with salt, pepper, thyme, minced onion and an egg (if eggs were cheap), and bake it in the oven. When it was good and brown, she made a sauce from half a cup of ketchup, two cups of boiling water, seasoning, a dash of strong coffee, thickened it with flour and poured it over the baked stuff. It was good, hot, tasty and staying. What was left over, was sliced thin the next day and fried in hot bacon fat.


Mama made a very fine bread pudding from slices of stale bread, sugar, cinnamon and a penny apple sliced thin. When this was baked brown, sugar was melted and poured over the top. Sometimes she made what she had named Weg Geschnissen, which laboriously translated meant something made with bread bits that usually would be thrown away. Bits of bread were dipped into a batter made from flour, water, salt and an egg and then fried in deep hot fat. While they were frying, Francie ran down to the candy store and bought a penny's worth of brown rock candy. This was crushed with a rolling pin and sprinkled on top of the fried bits just before eating. The crystals didn't quite melt and that made it wonderful."

-from A Tree Grows in Brooklyn by Betty Smith

Post-Creativity Malaise

1) My writing group had its mini-retreat today. For the first 45 minutes, I did nothing but wish to be checking email, and then inspiration struck and I wrote some satisfactory stuff for a few hours. Now I'm drained and do not want to be seeing this computer any more.

2) Trixie got her appetite back today. Almost ate the dish. Maybe it was the aspirin (for her corneal edema) that was causing the issue, and she received her last dose of that last night. I am very relieved. Lack of appetite, in dogs or humans, is utterly mysterious to me.

3) I care very little about sports, but having my alma mater (Butler) in the final four may be of benefit. Maybe next time when a coworker asks where I went to pharmacy school, his/her response could be something other than, "Huh. Where is that?"

15-Minute Supper

Throw parsley (or watercress or arugula or whatever), juice of 1 lemon, salt, pepper, and garlic clove into food processor. With motor running, drizzle in olive oil until desired consistency is achieved. Toss the parsley pesto with hot whole-wheat pasta, cooked al dente. Heat stainless steel pan (something not non-stick) over med-high heat and sear scallops (or shrimp or white fish) on each side, seasoned with S+P. Squeeze lemon juice on top. There it is.

Thursday Thirteen

This edition borrowed from Janet, who borrowed it from someone else.

1. I am thinking....should I go running tonight? Or should I stay on the couch and watch what Netflix has brought?

2. I am thankful for.....the outdoor farmers market to resume its schedule April 17! Cranberry oatmeal scones, asparagus, and wildflower honey are on the list!

3. From the kitchen.....beer-battered cod and stewed okra with tomatoes tonight.

4. I am wearing......blue sweater that sheds angora everywhere (but is beautiful blue), black pants, pink slippers.

5. I am creating.....another layer of confusion on that old novel I've been tinkering on for a while.

6. I am going.....to visit Indianapolis in July!!

7. I am reading.....The Cry of the Sloth by Sam Savage. I smile at it until my face hurts. I love epistolary novels; they are so rare.

8. I am hoping.....Trixie's eye drops are more easily instilled today. She has stopped the whining and starting a horrible desperate painful yelping now that is AWFUL to hear. I feel so mean.

9. I am hearing.....the fridge running, that ole energy hog, and Trixie grumbling about something.

10. Around the house....I have removed every speck of clutter that I can find. Orderly house, orderly mind.

11. One of my favorite things.....is grocery shopping. I could probably spend 30 minutes just in the cheese section.

12. A few plans for the rest of the week.....writing group mini-retreat on Saturday!

13. A picture to share.....Trixie, bundled like a burrito, 12/07.

Newest Tea Addiction

Sometimes I say that I don't care for fruity teas, but sometimes I am mistaken.

Random YouTube Happiness

Well, I just purchased a new roof for my house. I guess it will be beans and rice for dinner. In case you're counting, this is what I have bought in the last two months: furnace, carpet, roof, three commodes. Each one has been a lot less than I thought, but these things do accumulate.

Now I just need to fix the garage door, do some painting of walls, and maybe my semi-elective improvements for 2010 will be complete. Maybe. Probably not.

Anyway, to soften the edges of this Tuesday, here is a happy video that my brother shared with me. I love watching dachshunds run.

Yeasty Experiments

When I make pizza at home, I am embarrassed to admit that usually I buy frozen pizza dough. Last Friday at the grocery store I thought, this is inexcusable. I have flour, water, yeast, and time.

So used the first pizza dough recipe that I found (this one from Emeril) and gave it a try. I don't have a stand mixer, so I just stirred with a wooden spoon for about 30 seconds until everything looked homogenous. IT TURNED OUT PERFECTLY. And it was tastier and FASTER than using frozen dough. The frozen kind has to be brought to room temp, which takes forever and forward-thinking tendencies, and the rolling-out can be a hassle because it likes to spring back into a ball. This dough started out warmer than room temp and spread out to any shape I wanted with no complaint.

I brushed on some olive oil, red pepper flake, and oregano, par-baked it for a bit, then topped with marinara, nearly a whole head of garlic, sauteed mushrooms and zucchini, and provolone, and baked until bubbly. Good! Cheap!

Breakfast

I assert that there is no better breakfast in the world besides toasted homemade bread with almond butter. Well, toasted homemade bread with apricot preserves is also decent. Or with butter and honey. Or three small slices with each of the above.

It's a good day. I will spend the next chunk of it watching O Brother, Where Art Thou?

(We thought you was a toad! Weee. Thooought. Yooou. Waaas. A toad!)

Eye Drops, Continued

Trixie has had enough of it all. I can't blame her for it. I strongly dislike eye drops too. She has resorted to using her teeth. I'm sure that Cesar Milan covered this in an episode, somewhere. But it's been a few years since I've seen the show. So I had to buy a muzzle, and I felt terrible about it. But I thought that this would be the answer to the problem.

I put the muzzle on her, and she immediately launched into full-panic mode. Arching her back, banging her nose on the floor, clawing her nose (dangerously close to her eyes), crying, making choking sounds, jerking her head around. Her panic created my panic, or more likely it was the other way around. It was AWFUL. Even without the risk of being bitten, she was so wild that it was even more difficult to get in an eye drop. And I didn't. Not even close. I took off that muzzle and cried in disappointment.

I decided that it was time to begin the taper-down schedule early. Once daily drops instead of twice. I tried again in the morning (with the muzzle) and got it done with a more manageable level of struggle. Mornings are always better, it seems. I have that calm and assertive aura at that time.

Oh, Trixie. It is wonderful news that you do not hold grudges.

Friday Fresh Bread!

Today I baked up another loaf of no-knead bread: multigrain whole wheat. Best one yet. This is very similar to the one I made last time, except that this one has no rye flour, no seedy topping, and I dissolved a drizzle of honey in with the water before mixing. The yeast seemed to appreciate the extra sugar to chew on. And I appreciate not having every horizontal surface in the kitchen covered in flax seeds after slicing. There are plenty of flax seeds and millet on the inside though.

I used the bread as a utensil for this divine coconut red lentil soup. So easy, so cheap, so comforting, and the color of a sunset! Perfect for a snowy weekend, perhaps winter's last hurrah, and one of my few remaining opportunities to fully savor a soup before I have to remember my favorite salads.

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Trixter

She isn't really guarding that stash of toys. She's patiently observing me prepare her peanut butter and pill fragments treat.

Eyes

Trixie and I visited a doggie ophthalmologist today. Everybody there was astonished at her finely-tuned reflexes toward anyone who approached her eyes. "She's like a cat!" they said.

A technician had the job of holding a whiny and wiggly Trixie for a long time while the vet did some tests. Once Trixie was set down on the floor with the freedom to go anywhere, the silly dog trotted right over to the same technician and begged to be picked up! Trixie forgives!

She has corneal edema, and we still don't really know why, but it is not terribly serious, and it is getting better. It might be reversible and it might not, but there are several treatment options available to keep things from progressing. Some of these options are pills, NOT EYE DROPS, and I am thrilled at the prospect.

So, maybe just three more weeks of her current eye drop, in a tapering schedule. It's going to be a long three weeks.

Disappointing

I was really looking forward to filling out the census.

I got two mailings prior to receiving the real census form. The first was a letter, warning me that the actual form was coming soon, and please please please would I fill it out. The second was a postcard that provided a phone number and web address to assist me in case of questions encountered while completing the form.

I was prepared for a complicated and lengthy form. I was excited about what kind of trivia I might be asked to provide.

I got the real thing in the mail today! So thrilling! Opened immediately!

So disappointing. All they want to know is: name, age, race, do I rent or own. Really? Not interesting at all. I couldn't even get descriptive about my heritage. If I were Hispanic or Asian I could have specified from a nice list of subgroups, but White is White. So bland. So much fuss for a few unrevealing facts.

Sunday Seven

1) I am thankful that daylight savings time has passed, because now I have an extra hour in which to view Twin Peaks episodes. I am not allowed to watch it after dark. Ooo!!

2) Trixie's eye looks a little better after several days of eye drops. But she has gotten sneakier about avoidance. As soon as I drag over the floor lamp to the couch, she knows what's up.

3) I made spicy chocolate shortbread cookies. They had cayenne pepper, cinnamon, and melted dark chocolate within. EXCELLENT.

4) The carpet selection is settled- pumpkin spice is the name. Guests will enter my house year-round and sense an autumnal crispness to the rooms and a craving for roasted turkey. The carpet will cost more than the furnace.

5) I bought a new whistling tea kettle. It is adorable and lemon-yellow, but does not whistle. Too much steam escapes from the lid. I guess I'll return it and keep my ten-year old kettle for a while longer.

6) I did my taxes yesterday. When the refunds arrive, every penny is going directly into the student loans. The date for becoming debt-free looms ever closer. I can't wait to uncork a bottle of something expensive and say goodbye to Sallie Mae forever. Maybe I should plan a series of increasing celebrations for every significant milestone I pass in paying off the loan?

7) Listening to Trixie snore while she sleeps on her back makes me so happy.

Letter #2

Dear Ibuprofen,
Thank you for dulling my awareness of various leg injuries so that I may run faster and further. I couldn't do it without you. Although some day I will need hospitalization for gastric ulcers and knee replacements, even that hospital gown will not be able to disguise how awesome I look from all that running.

Yours truly,
S.G.

Anna Karenina

I finished the book a few days ago. Overall I'm glad I read it, but am relieved that it's done. It took me so long to complete, and meanwhile my to-read stack has become dangerous.

Stuff I Didn't Like:
-The enormous list of characters, most of whom weren't necessary, except for the small handful of people that were introduced at around page 5, then turn up again around page 650 without a reminder of who they were.
-Maybe it's less confusing in Russian, but several characters had identical (or nearly so) names, and everybody might be referred to by first name, last name, version of father's name, or nickname interchangeably. For example, there was Vasenka and Varenka (these two even showed up in the same chapter!), Katavasov and Kartasov, and Anna's husband and lover were both named Alexis (but thankfully were usually called by last name).
-Tolstoy liked to have his characters give long speeches about political and social ideas that were important to him. I might care, if he tried to work it into the story rather than some long, spontaneous pontification at a dinner party.
-Last fifty pages (Part VIII) were anti-climactic.


Stuff I Liked:
-The double-plot, even though it was loose and baggy at times and prone to meandering, was good for my short attention span. The two plots were gently interwoven in spots that I didn't notice until after they had already passed.
-Lots of slice-of-life, memorable, imagery packed scenes. Rich and dense.
-Made me hungry for black peasant rye bread, cabbage soup, and buckwheat porridge.
-Sections of inner turmoil (of which there were many) were generally much more interesting than scenes of action (of which there were few).

I have now completed my quota of Russian novels for Winter 2010 and will consider future options for 2011.

Nothing Original To Say

And so I offer this Academy Award Winning Movie Trailer.

Multigrain Sourdough Rye

It worked! I would have preferred a stronger sourness, but it has a wonderful crackly crust, crunch from all those seeds, and good nutty rye flavor. It is messy--I eat it over the sink to protect the floor from the rain of flaxseeds.

It's been a better day with Trixie and her eyedrops so far. I wrapped her in a blanket and tucked her in a corner of the couch. The arm and back of the couch prevented her from moving forward, my body blocked her from sneaking backward, and the blanket decreased her wiggliness. Both hands free! Thanks, couch! Sorry about those plots to replace you!

Bread Thoughts

I am working on a second loaf of no-knead bread today. Having felt terribly guilty about all that white flour that I ate last week (recalling my former low-carb days, and then my whole-grain amendment), I am making a multi-grain sourdough rye. There is still quite a bit of white flour in there, and I didn't want to go too crazy with heavy seeds and such in case it affected rising, so I limited myself to whole wheat flour, rye flour, flax seeds, and millet seeds (I think millet seeds are so cute). And then the topping will include more flax, millet, wheat bran, and coarse cornmeal.

Hopefully it will not disappoint. Only about 13 more hours until I find out. I obtained the appropriate yeast today (instant) and used warm water instead of cold, and saw a huge difference in volume within the first hour.

I am mildly obsessed with this bread-baking thing. The Breadtopia website is only fueling it.

Trixie's Bad Days

Trixie has been disturbed by an interruption in her quiet life. In a short stretch of time, she has gotten her nails clipped, ears cleaned, resumed regular walks now that the weather is warmer (she still hates walks), got a bath last night in which I chased her around the bathtub with the steroid spray for her itchy spots (she hates the sprayer), and today went to the vet for the yearly checkup. She wasn't listening for the worst of the news for herself--she needs a dental cleaning. (Actually, I was pleasantly surprised at the cost estimate for general anesthesia and cleaning- very reasonable!)

But the most negative news was directed at me. Trixie needs eye drops for a while. She has corneal edema (thankfully in just one eye) of unknown origin, and if the drops don't clear things up quickly we will be seeing a canine ophthamologist.

Giving eye drops to Trixie is RIDICULOUS. The vet tried to prove to both of us that it could be done with one person, but she wasn't able to do it. She asked, "is there a certain time of day when Trixie is a little more sleepy, maybe?" and I had to laugh. Trixie is always well-rested and up to the challenge. She is wiggly, slippery, and astonishingly creative and quick-thinking to remove herself from every hold I devise. I need one hand to hold the drug bottle, one hand to hold her head, and my legs just aren't adequate to keep the rest of her in place. And then there is my own fear of eye drops to combat; every time I get close enough to have a chance to get it done, I pause with my internal turmoil just long enough for her to figure out an escape.

Tonight I think I might have gotten a tiny bit of drug in her eye, in addition to the drops spilled on her nose. But I'm not sure enough, and so after this break I will try again. I'll wrap her up like a burrito in her favorite blanket first. Maybe that will reduce the slipperiness.

Trixie wags her tail merrily during this whole process. She thinks it's a neat game. She especially likes when I growl in frustration.

Cheese Souffle

I am generally suspicious of frozen baked goods and like trying to make everything from scratch as much as possible, but I could not resist this French cheese souffle in a bag. Just heap the frozen nuggets in a small greased ramekin (if I had thought of it, layered with veggies), load into oven, and....
Thirty minutes later I find a puffed souffle, crispy on the edges and oozing with Emmentaler cheese! Like a fluffy and crustless quiche! Yay Trader Joes!
It was a good day. My heirloom beans arrived in the mail. Seven pounds is less than I thought. My plan was to make chili this week, but now I worry that chili isn't special enough, and I should hoard these for a special recipe?

BTW, I am trying to blog about subjects other than food, but the trouble is that I eat every day, and food is just so fascinating and limitless!

The Sunday Night Black Cloud

So, I have been attending church again. It's a different one than I visited before, and I kinda like it. I was trying to find a perfect church, and now that I have accepted that such a place does not exist, I am suddenly content.

When I was in high school, I always thought that it would be a great plan to get all of my homework done on Friday night so that the rest of the weekend would be relaxing. But I was never able to do that. Not only did I wait until Sunday night to start the homework, but I waited until very very late on Sunday night. I continued that throughout college. Then I did some teaching part-time after college, teaching a lab in which Monday mornings usually took a large amount of preparation. I used to put off thinking about it until late on Sundays, just to pretend that the weekend was never going to end. I did not sleep well on Sunday nights.

Now my job is tremendously less stressful. I don't bring work home with me. I rarely even have work-related emails to answer. I don't have presentations to sweat about. I just show up! I only have to pack a lunch! But I have noticed that the vestiges of the Sunday night black cloud remain. Late in the evening I get a vague itchiness to do something productive. I vacuum, pay bills, clean the bathroom mirrors...rarely anything that has a near time stamp for completion. There is no good reason for all this.

I am banishing the guilty feeling, starting today. I am not going to be productive on Sundays any more, from now on.* I'm generally lazy as it is, but I think that I need a full day devoted to recharging. No more cleaning of closets! No more washing the dog! (Maybe I'll stop exercising on Sundays, too, although I'll have to think about that one. I like early Sunday running.) A day for rest and renewal! Goodbye, black cloud.



*Except for that one weekend per month that I work my paying job, of course. That's OK. Somebody has got to be at the hospital.

Resolutions Revisited

An update on how I am progressing with the New Years Resolutions:

1. Buy a piano.
Today I shopped for carpet to go beneath that piano. I am attracted to a sample called "pumpkin spice," and wondering if the name is the main reason for its charm. Next week the measuring will get done, and then the date will be set for installation. I am getting the whole house re-carpeted (in the places that already had carpet), and abandoning the ideas for laminate flooring for now. Carpet is expensive enough. Laminate floors, and the cost and mess of removing the kitchen tile, make me nauseated. I will have to live with the ugly tile.

So, another month or two and maybe the piano will be here. I guess it's good that I'm not ready to buy right now. It may have to be transported in through the back patio doors, and the yard will be snowy/muddy for much of March. No need to ruin the new carpet immediately.

2. Plant a raspberry bush.
Deferred until spring, although I should begin investigating when the ideal planting time should be.

3. Complete a short story.
Nope. My writing group is having a mini-retreat at the end of March; I plan to rearrange my mess of paper scraps then.

4. Complete the Couch to 5K plan.
I am really off-schedule for this. A new pain appeared, that I suspect is plantar fasciitis. It arrives as soon as I near the completion of the 5-minute walking warm-up period, and doesn't subside until around 45 minutes of determined continuation. Very discouraging. Ibuprofen works OK for the shin splints and knee pain but doesn't touch this. So, I am still treadmilling regularly, but am not increasing the running distances at all.

5. Read Anna Karenina.
I am on page 671 out of 806 total pages. There will be a lot to say once it is finished.

Fresh Bread

Well, it does look rustic. By "rustic", I mean "blob-shaped." It's partly supposed to be that way, and it wasn't helped by the use of active dry yeast rather than instant, which I think decreased the rise. Next time, I will know better!
But I did get just the texture I was hoping for: very crusty crust and fluffy inside with irregular nooks and crannies. It is plain in flavor, but for something that is mostly white flour, that's to be expected. I have big plans for seedy multigrain, cheesy, and kalamata olive/spicy pepper varieties.

Trixie is extremely enthusiastic about this bread. There is nothing that she won't eat, but bread is usually no particular thrill. I think that observing and smelling the 20-hour process was suspenseful for her.

Eeeee

I have the appropriate vessel in my possession. Approximately 20 hours from now, there might be fresh bread in the house.


(After all that fuss about a coupon, BB&B did not even have this dutch oven in stock. Only ugly dutch ovens. So, I went, couponless, to a small, locally owned kitchen supply store, where the item was featured in the front window!)

Ethiopian Chickpea Stew

I can't get enough of this Ethiopian chickpea stew. I thought that the spices would get tiresome after eating through the huge pot, but I'd like to make another batch this weekend. The onions are sort of caramelized and sweet, the roasted chickpeas have a nutty crunch, and the spices are toasty and bold enough to make me sweat. I chose to decrease the clove measurement in half, and I believe that this was a wise decision. Brown rice worked well instead of flatbread.

I didn't miss the lack of meat, but I think that beef stew meat or shreds of leftover pot roast would get along well with the other ingredients. Next time, I might substitute turnips or parsnips or cauliflower for some of the potatoes.

Now I must search for more recipes using ground cardamom, to justify purchasing the large jar.

Coupon

I hope this gets easier.

I'm about to dash out of the house and meet my writing group (I love those people!), and so I have time for only a very brief posting.

Great news. I found something wonderful in the mailbox today. Well, two wonderful things, but I was expecting the Twin Peaks Season 2 Disc 2 anyway. I got a coupon from Bed Bath and Beyond. Finally!

Tomorrow, I will buy an appropriate dutch oven (I've got my eye on a Mario Batali one), and then I will start baking no-knead bread. I cannot wait.

Letter #1

Dear Winter,

I appreciate that you have allowed the ice to melt from my driveway, so that I have stopped worrying about the UPS guy fracturing his neck on it. And it's awesome to stop wearing the marshmallow coat and start wearing the Paddington bear coat with the toggle closures.

But please, ignore what all those other people are saying. They do not know you like I do. Stick around here for a month or two more. You are a misunderstood season. But I appreciate you. Especially now that January is a dim memory.

I have about 25 new soup recipes to make and I need all the time I can get. I need the gray skies and early sunsets and sighs of the furnace as encouragement. I need to extend my Sunday ritual of sipping apricot tea while listening to the stock pot simmer on the stove and snuggling a shivery Trixie in the armchair. And....I just bought nine pounds of dried heirloom beans from Rancho Gordo. That's a lot of chili and beans 'n greens soups. I hadn't planned on buying so much. But it wasn't my fault. I couldn't decide between the Christmas Limas or the Good Mother Stallards. I was torn between the Mayacobas and the Rio Zapes. Rancho Gordo has a flat-rate for all shipments! Not my rule! I just want chili! I am the victim here.

So, an extension of the refreshing temperatures are all I ask, and if it isn't too much of an addendum, maybe a wafer-thin whitening of the snow layer on the brown grass around my house.

Yours Truly,
SlyGly